Happy Birthday Alexis

Today would have been Lexie's second birthday. (My sister Martha's granddaughter who died of SIDS in 2005.) We went to the cemetery today, my other sister (Irma) and me. Dad's not a fan of cemeteries, mom decided to lunch with her friends instead, Martha was at work, and the kids aren't speaking to us. Ah well, probably better that way. We took her some flowers and birthday balloons. This year we didn't sing "Happy Birthday" though. I cleaned up her stone with some water and a washcloth, arranged the flowers, and arranged some other things that were still there from Christmas. They're really developing that area now, there are several small statues in the grotto area that weren't there before, the stone arrangement in front of the grotto now has a working fountain arrangement. It's lovely really, just a faint trickling noise as water flows from within three of the stones. On the way back to the car, I looked around at the new arrivals as I usually do. I saw a few stones that were completely covered in mud. It made me sad, so I stopped and cleaned them before we went home. That made me feel better. I think there's one I missed a few rows away, but I only caught a glimpse as I was walking to the car and I was out of water in my water bottles already (I brought a spray bottle and a squirt bottle, worked very well). I didn't cry this year, not at the cemetery anyway (I cried in the car on the way to pick Irma up at her house). Just a lot of reflection. I pictured her at two years old, having a birthday party... What made me more sad than that is the fact that it reminded me of Angel. I literally have seen him three times: when we went to visit the week after he was born in January of 2006, my uncle's anniversary in March, and my dad's birthday in April. He's going to be a year old later this month, and Cyndi doesn't want anyone from our family to see him. She even covered him up and ran off when she bumped into Irma's husband in the alley not long ago. I know that she knows it hurts us... *sigh* Cyndi and Martha dropped Angel off at my parents' house a few weeks ago, supposedly to let my mom and dad spend time with him. It was really so they could go to the gym to get in the jacuzzi. Well, my parents didn't mind keeping an eye on him, but they had to call Martha's cell phone and tell them to come back because he didn't recognize them anymore and wouldn't stop crying. I don't know what to do, so I just let it go. I can't force the issue, nor do I really want to. I'll just keep visiting Lexie, they can't keep her from us... Hopefully Angel takes some interest in our family when he's old enough to know better, but it seems unlikely at this time.